Success requires work!

As we head into a new year, many people are feverishly working on their new years resolutions lists and trying to complete their 2012 resolutions. Many people will follow through on their resolutions through February or March before they give up and fizzle out.  But a small number of people will continue to plug away through the entire year.  They will run into road blocks, speed bumps, and brick walls, but they will push through.  Nevertheless.  I love that word, it's one of my favorite words. Nevertheless.  To which group will you belong in the new year? 

Even if you belonged to the first group, you now have a chance to join  the second group. It will not be easy.  If you are like most people, you work a full time job, you are working on a degree, you have relationships to maintain, bills to pay, the list goes on.  I work a full time job, am working on two books, and my MBA program starts in a few days.  Your life list may be slightly different or slightly similar.  Nevertheless, if you want to be successful in the new year and for the rest of your life for that matter; whatever your idea of success is, success requires work. 

The following list will help you as you strive to be successful.  This is the list that has helped me in the past:

• Make a list of everything you would like to accomplish in 2013.  Make the list comprehensive, realistic, and short.  If you put too many items on your plate, your list, you probably will get only one or two things done, or nothing at all will be completed.  My Dad told me something a few years ago and I believe that is why I now have my bachelor's degree: 'You start but you don't finish'.  Ouch! He didn't mean it in a general sense, he was referring to my having not finished my degree at that point.  This leads to my next point.
• Listen to people who have your best interests at heart.  You don't have to do everything they say, but you should hear what they are saying.  Surround yourself with smart, forward-thinking people.  People whose lives you can see are headed in the right direction.   would you take advice from someone whose life is a mess and doesn't seem to be headed in the right direction?
• Learn to say no.  During the two years it took me to finish my bachelor's, I had to say no to many things I would have loved to do.  I was asked to teach a class, go to the movies, join certain groups.  Those were all good things to do, but my priority at that time was school.  Yes, I took a break once in a while to go to a movie or to the beach, but I did not add more items to my plate or hang  out with friends every weekend. Which, by the way, leads to my next point.
• Learn to prioritize.   Once you make your list, re-write your list in order of priority.  Did you know that everyone has priorities?  Whether they tell you what those priorities are, is another story.  Sometimes they may be your priority, but you may not be theirs.  Make sure you know what your priorities are and only change them if you are comfortable with the changes. 
• Check off each item as it as completed.  I am a list and day timer person.  I realize not everyone can be this way, I don't understand why.  Nevertheless, that's what works for me.  Checking items off your list will give you a sense of accomplishment and makes you look forward to the next items on your list with an "I can do this" attitude.  And you can do this!  Regardless of the road blocks, speed bumps and brick walls, you can do it.  We all run into blocks, getting through them is what separates us from the February fizzlers and makes us successful.  Go for it in 2013! Nevertheless!

Grief, what to do with it?

Before Sandy hook and after, grief was and is, and will be.  My heart continues to break along with human beings all over the world who can only ask 'why, how?' I feel a consensus of numbness and disbelief wherever I go and to whomever I speak.  As human beings we just cannot bring ourselves to believe that something exists in another human being that can bring him, or her, to the point of committing such an act as was committed at Newtown, CT., USA. 

Many discussions have ensued: gun control, mental illness, and of course silly conspiracy theories. But what about grief?  How should we deal with the grief?  "For in much wisdom is much grief: and he  that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow." Ecclesiastes 1:18.  The smarter we become as a society, as human beings, the more we let some things slide; go by the wayside.  If we are to have a chance as human beings, just like in any personal relationship, we must face every aspect of that relationship: the good, the bad, and the ugly.  That is the only way the relationship will grow and become beautiful, and cherished.

We must face grief, walk through it and keep going until it no longer engulfs us.  At the same time we cannot forget it.  It becomes not a garish uncomely way for us to present ourselves to the world; but a part of us that is strength, empathy, remembrance, and honor.  We are strong in that we made it through.  We empathize with others who are walking through.  We remember our loss--a child, a loved one.  We honor that loved one. When we do these things, we realize we can make it through.

The fiscal cliff

What I am about to say will seem harsh to some and true to others.  We should be ready for the fiscal cliff whether or not it happens.  As Americans we should be more financially prepared for whatever comes down the pike than we usually are.  Unfortunately this type of thinking comes later in life after we have made most of our financial mistakes and are in the midst of fixing, or 'repairing' those mistakes. 

One of my favorite phrases lately is 'you don't know what's coming down the pike.'  Since no one knows what's coming down the pike, we must save accordingly.  I have discussed this in previous posts but I cannot say it enough.  No matter how much or how little we make, we must put something away for a rainy day.  In these days of rampant layoffs, downsizing or demotions, and  multiple job changes during our working years; we have to find a way to stay ahead of the curve, or the mayhem that ensues when a sudden financial loss occurs in our lives. 

It is only a matter of time for each of us to hit a terrible financial roadblock, something we did not see coming.  American society has gone through some serious financial changes since 2008 when the housing bubble burst, uh, exploded.  Some of us have considered our financial ways, but many people still want to keep up with the Joneses, overspend, and live above our means.  But what happens when that unexpected pink slip is so kindly handed to us and we do not have three to six months saved for a rainy day?

I am not trying to spread doom and gloom, I am spreading hope.  We can maintain our own hope by exercising common sense in our spending, the amount of debt we allow ourselves to carry, and paying attention to the signs and to the times.  Too many of us are crashing and burning financially every time a pink slip is handed out.  Let us maintain more control over what happens to us financially if or when we are sent packing whether it is being released from our job or if our tax burden increases because we go over the fiscal cliff, which some have mentioned is actually a fiscal slope. 

Slope or cliff, we must not be afraid but do the best we can with what we have, what we have been given. 

The end of the world!

Altun Ha Mayan Ruins, outside Belize City

If you have been keeping track of the Mayan Calendar, the end of the world is  upon us, in a little more than two weeks at the time of this writing.  I've been to the Maya Ruins known as Altun Ha, just outside Belize City on a couple of occasions.  I am always impressed by the way the Mayans built their temples.  These people, like the Egyptians, had some kind of extra inside tip on mathematics or something.  Their beliefs were 'interesting', but their buildings are amazing.  At any rate, according to the Mayan calendar we are at the end of the world, are you ready?

 

As a Christian, I believe what the Bible says, which is that we should 'Watch therefore: for ye know not what hour your Lord doth come.' Matthew 24:42.  I don't know about you, but I am a literal believer in the God of the Book and what His Book says.  Yes, the Maya were an intelligent people, they built great temples, and the items found in their burial temples are said to be amazing; but whatever is supposed to happen in two weeks I am not convinced it is the end of the world.  I sometimes wonder though, if there may be a change of some kind that will happen.  It's nothing I read or a conversation I in which I took part, it's just a recurring thought that these people were intelligent.  From where did they obtain their information?

 

At any rate, whatever they knew and from wherever they obtained their information, I will opt for being ready for when Jesus comes back.  What does being ready for when Jesus comes back really mean?  It means spending your days talking to Jesus, your nights praying for your enemies as well as your friends, spending time in His word, and thanking Him for forgiving you of your sins and loving you despite those sins.  In a nutshell, stay in relationship with Jesus, share Him with others, live the best life you can; and everything else will fall into place, even when it's the end of the world.   

Walking Through, part 2

So in my last post I talked about the fact that God speaks to us but that we need to listen for His voice.  Sometimes He speaks into our spirit, sometimes He speaks through His Word, and sometimes He sends someone to speak to us.

In this post I would like to give you an example of when He sends someone to speak to us.  What we must keep in mind when someone approaches us is that we must have the right attitude.  Everyone on this planet has a voice from the richest to the poorest, don't let looks fool you.

Just today as a group of us sat for Sunday dinner, we talked about how we need to treat everyone with respect regardless of their station in life because we never know where they will end up, and we definitely never know where and how we will end up.  It's not a matter of treating people right for what we can get from them; its treating people right because its the right thing to do.  The same cup of water you deny someone out of meanness, is the same cup of water you or your grand child could be denied 20 or 30 years from now.

As Christians we should be aware of who is trying to speak into our lives.  I believe we should be  attuned to what people are saying and if its not gelling with our spirit, we can always say 'thanks but no thanks', in a polite way.  But there are times when we know God sent someone, and we had better listen.  It may seem weird at first, but as we listen to the person we put everything together, even dissecting the conversation afterwards, to make sense of it all.  That's what happened to me.

I love the country of Belize.  Belize is in Central America, bordered to the north by Mexico, to the west by Guatemala and Honduras, and to the east by The Caribbean Sea.  If I were to describe Belize in one word I would say: eclectic.  There are mountains, waterfalls, beaches, and jungles.  All types of people live in Belize: Mayan Indians, Mexicans, Latin Americans, blacks of African descent, Caucasians, and Chinese.  It's people are just as eclectic as its landscape.

One day, on one of my many visits to Belize, I was sitting on my favorite beach relaxing.  There was hardly anyone on the beach and I was enjoying the opportunity to do nothing, something that is very difficult for me to do.  The day before, I had been in Belize City, where I usually stay for just one night before heading north or south.  I had purchased the usual souvenirs for family and friends, but one man was selling hand made beaded bracelets.  I remember being hesitant about purchasing the bracelet.  I  asked him about the color scheme, what it meant, he told me there was no particular meaning. 

So the next day, I'm on the beach relaxing, and this tall fair skinned, apparently Indian man seemed to come out of nowhere, walking down the beach.  I had never seen him in my previous visits but did not think anything of it until he walked up to me and crouched down next to my lounge chair.  He did not try to hit on me, he did not try to make small talk, he got straight to the point.  He pointed to my bracelet and asked me if I knew what the colors meant.  I was immediately interested.  I told him I did not know, it was just a bracelet I bought in Belize City the day before.  He told me in a polite manner, that I had no reason to wear that bracelet, it was not for me.  I hid my shock and when he finished talking to me he told me to have a nice day and walked away. I have never seen him again.  Needless to say, I did not like the fact that I had spent money on something I would have to throw in the trash, but in the trash it went.

I have never forgotten that 'conversation', he did all of the talking, but I will always believe God sent him.  Whatever was going on with that bracelet, God was protecting me, I have no doubt.   As I posted in Walking Through part 1, we need to listen to and for God's voice.  We also need to obey his voice.  How do we know its Him? We have to spend time daily with Him.  We need to cultivate and maintain our relationship with Him, just as we would with any relationship of importance.  When we cultivate and maintain relationships, we get to know the voice of the person we are in relationship with, even if our backs are turned when they walk into the room.  Its the same with God's voice.         

Walking through

Last week our church had a guest speaker.  I have been dissecting my notes from that sermon ever since.  The title of the sermon was 'Position for Influence'.  Pastor Mark Ramsey of Citipointe Church in Brisbane, Australia, said a lot of profound things during that sermon; but it was a story that he told that really gripped my heart.  As I sit here writing, uh, typing this blog, tears are coming to my eyes.  
He told this story of being out on a ski lift with some other church leaders and as they were going along in the ski lift they saw two skiers moving at high speed down the ski slope.  They heard the lead skier yelling commands at the skier following closely behind: 'left!', 'right!', 'straight!'.  They later found out that the 'following' skier was blind.  Pastor Ramsey went on to say, and I'm paraphrasing,  that no matter what outside noises the blind skier heard, he heard his leader above it all.  He also said that 'we need to become good at being led by The Holy Spirit.' 

The story of the blind skier got to me.  I wondered if I were truly hearing, or listening out for God's voice.  Many of us as Christians can tell of at least one time in our relationship with Christ when He has spoken into our spirit.  It was so pervasive that we could not avoid it no matter how much we might have tried.  Trust me, there have been times when I have tried to look the other way when God was speaking to me.  It just was not convenient to do what He had asked.  Of course in the end, I would end up obeying.  Hey, I'm just being real. 

As we grow in our relationship with Christ, the hesitancy, fear, or discomfort should become less and less, right?  Well, as I sat there listening to the sermon, I began to write a check for the guest speaker, for an affordable amount, when that voice showed up and gave me another dollar amount.  Wouldn't you know it was double the amount I had in mind?  The battle began. I sat in the pew  struggling.  God won. I wrote the check.

It had been some time since I had heard God's voice like that.  The last few months my relationship with Christ has been a struggle.  Deep down I knew I would not turn my back on God, I would not walk away, but I have been dealing with deep hurt, so for Him to talk to me on that level, telling me how much to write the check for, it had been a while.  Like many of you who have been Christians for some time, God does not give me any wiggle room.  When He tells me to do or not to do something, He makes Himself quite clear in His instructions. 

Let me tell you one more story as proof.  Many years ago, in the early 2000's, I had stopped at the Mobil gas station at the corner of Sand Lake and Orange Blossom Trail, local readers know exactly where that is.  As I was pumping gas into my new Jeep a homeless man was walking by with a shopping cart that probably carried all of his belongings.  I will never forget the beautiful curly hair this man had.  Most people have some noticeable trait and his was his curly hair.  Just then, the Holy Spirit told me to go into the store and buy three particular items, put them into a bag, and hand them to this man.  Immediately I pretended not to hear what I thought I just heard. No way, that was so way out of my comfort zone.  I got into my Jeep and drove out into traffic.  God kept speaking to me, telling me over and over to do this thing. I was at the light! Sigh.  I turned around and went back into the Mobil, picked up the items, but instead of a can of Coca Cola I picked up a bottle of Coca Cola.  Immediately God said to me, "I did not tell you to pick up a bottle of Coca Cola, I told you a can of Coca Cola."  I put the bottle back and picked up the can.  I had picked up the bottle because it was more for the man to drink, I was trying to be practical.  I drove back out to the traffic light wondering how I would get this done as he was already at the cross walk.  It just so happened that I was first at the light.  If you know that intersection you know that was a God thing.  As I got to the light and he started to cross, I rolled down my window and called out to him.  I handed him the bag, he looked at me, looked at my Jeep, looked back at me, and said 'thank you.'  He had already opened the soda before he reached the other side of the street.

I will probably never know why God said can versus bottle, but I will always remember that command from God.  I don't know if it will ever get easy, at least for me, to step out of my comfort zone, but step out I will.  Even when I'm walking through the valley, I will trust and obey God. I have to '...become good at being led by The Holy Spirit', no matter what life throws at me and He allows.       

"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me." Psalm 23:4. 

Your Landscape

On Sunday November 4th I had the great opportunity to  walk across the stage and accept my diploma.  I am now a college graduate with a Bachelor of Science Degree in Management.  It was a long time in coming.  I started attending college right after I graduated high school, but I allowed life to get in the way.  I did not have my priorities straight.  Funny how our priorities become more focused as we get older.  But we cannot recapture time, we can only do our best with the time we have left. What's on your 'to do' list? I believe that everyone of us has at least one thing we wish we had done and now believe it is too late.  This phenomenon is especially true for those of us who are older.  I have always admired people who have stepped out and 'gone for it'.  They stepped out on faith, willing to risk losing everything, or at least losing quite a bit, in order to meet that goal.  I will ask you again: what's on your 'to do' list?
Don't worry about the people who tell you it's too late.  Our commencement speaker said something that will stick with me forever.  He said 'haters are a part of the landscape.'  I never thought about it like that.  We will always have naysayers, people who genuinely do not want to see us hurt, people who think they will look bad if you look good, and people who for their own low self-esteem can't stand to see others succeed.  I believe most of us can tell the difference between these people.  Regardless of the reasons friends and family may try to stop us, we have to decide for ourselves what we really  want out of our lives.  We have to take the risk that we may lose some people along the way.  Some of those people may come back once you have met your goals, some may never come back.  You have to decide if you want to live a status quo, go along to get along life, or if you want everything God has for you. 
I know a couple who when most people their age are thinking about retirement have moved to another continent to become missionaries.  My father, who is in his early 70's, has just published his third book.  I admire these people.  They don't believe in making excuses.  Life is too short for excuses. 
What has God put on your heart to do with your life?  Nothing worth having is easy.  The process will not be easy.  There will be many sleepless  nights, aggravation with the process, fears of not finishing, negative self-talk, and haters, but keep going.  No one can take away the feeling of success when you touch that finish line.  No one can take that thing away from you that you have achieved or obtained. 
Step out! Step up! Go for it!

What's going on!?

Just when things seemed to be turning around for the markets, at least here in the U.S., the Dow--Dow Jones Industrials dropped sharply and closed down over 200 points a few days before this article was written.  Depending on where and how your money is invested, you felt the down turn directly, or indirectly.  In some cases, again due to in what you are invested, you may not have felt the down turn at all.  To keep it simple and to make my point fo this post however, I will talk to those who felt the down turn.  What do you do when you take such a sharp hit?  Most people believe you hang on for the ride just like in past times when the Dow, and just about any other of the averages, have tanked and then turned around.  That's what the markets do, they go up and they go down;  but when you average things out over a number of years, you would have ended up making money on your investments.  Patience and research are the key.  And of course if you don't know what you are doing, talk to someone who does, a professional.
Why am I saying all of this? Because no matter how much we have or do not have, life will go on.  If we do not die first, we will all age.  Are you ready to age?  Are you ready to retire? Have you been wondering what Medicare and Social Security will look like by the time you retire?  I think everyone should give some serious thought to these questions.  In the meantime, I strongly suggest that everyone take part somehow, in what your financial picture will look like.  How do you do this? By taking part in your company's 401k or 403b plan; or whatever type of retirement plan your employer, uh, employs.  If your company does not offer any of these things, start your own savings plan.  If you are not the saving type, have your bank help you by putting your money in an account where it's not so easy to touch that money. 
I am simply suggesting that you do something to positively affect your financial future, now.  Don't wait and don't hope that everything will be OK.  I have mentioned in previous articles that it does not matter how much you make, you can get your finances in order and you can save something, even if it's just five dollars per pay check.  Whether you are making minimum wage or you are a company CEO, take part in your future.  You will be glad you did it. 

Fast

So over the last few months I have had to make certain major decisions and if it were one or two I would say it's just a part of life.  I would pray, think about the issue or issues, and when everything was settled in my mind that I had heard from God, I would go with what I had decided.
This time however, I had five major issues and three smaller not necessarily minor issues to think about.  I prayed for months, waiting, praying, waiting, praying.  You get the idea.  Nothing.  Now let me reiterate that these were not decisions such as what errands to run on what day, or whether  I should go on a particular outing, or even how much I should or should not spend on a big ticket item.  These were potentially life changing decisions.  I had to make the right choice.  Nothing.
Finally I decided I would fast and pray about these decisions.  Furthermore, I would not set a time frame on the fast.  I would fast if it took the rest of my life!  I was serious.  These decisions, wrong or right, could change my life!  Why no answer from God about this? So I started my fast.  I am not going to discuss the particular fast because fasting is what is important, not the type of fast.  I will say, for you doubters out there who think I just fasted television for an hour a day or something easy like that.  It wasn't.  I talked to God about the fast and then I began.  Three weeks went by, almost four, when God said, 'you can end your fast now.'  I was not having it though.  I had not received any answers and I could not end this fast until I knew what to do.  I argued with God, of course.  I asked him how he could end my fast when he had not answered me yet. He told me again, 'you can end your fast now.' 
I ended my fast wondering what to do next.  I still had five major questions and no answers.  Then some weird stuff started happening.  One by one, in no particular order, I started receiving answers!  I had written down the items for which I had been praying and fasting and as the answers came, I would chuckle to myself as I checked off each question.  The answers came over a series of days, out of the clear blue sky, from different sources.  I had to be open and aware.  I had to keep my eyes and ears  open or I would miss the answer! One answer I heard from my Mother, one I heard from my Brother (they had no idea about my fast or my problems), one I heard from an announcement in church, one was an answer of protection from God, and one was a little $2.50 book I bought from Dollar General!  This was amazing!
Would I have gotten the answers without praying and fasting?  Probably, but I'm convinced it would have taken a lot longer and I did not have time.  I did not want to make the wrong decisions while waiting.  Many of us are guilty of that.  Well, there are two more items on my list, but I am convinced those items will be answered in their own time.  In fact, I may have received the answer to one of those two from a sermon I was just listening to on television.  Amazing!
I would like to say a few things to those of you who are not familiar with the tenets of fasting.  It is not something to take lightly.  When you fast you are opening your spirit to the spirit world. Yeah, I know, some of you are thinking I am about to get all Halloween on you.  I suggest you take what I am saying very seriously.  If you are not where you need to be in your relationship with Jesus, do that first.  Talk to him, pray, get into the right place with him before starting your fast.  There are many books on fasting, and many verses and chapters in the Bible on fasting.  Take it seriously, do it right.
Isaiah 58 is a great chapter to read on how God viewed fasting.  Read it in an easy to read version like the NIV.  Make sure you understand what fasting is all about before you start; and know this, your answer can come during your fast or after, but listen with everything in you, for that answer. Allow God to answer when and how He decides.

Are you fit?

Just like many of us fight the seemingly uphill battle to remain physically fit, we must fight to remain financially fit.  I have spoken on this subject before and I will speak on it in the future not only because part of the title of my blog is 'finance', but because financial fitness is important. 
Financial fitness does not mean we have to be filthy rich or even strive to be filthy rich. If it happens though, so much the better.  Financial fitness means that we have something saved for a rainy day. It means we  at least have something saved for an emergency.  Many of us have heard that we should have three to six months of reserve in case we lose our jobs. I believe we should work towards this goal, but the reality is many people are still suffering from job loss, lost homes, ruined credit, and the feeling that they will never make it back from financial ruin.     
The fact is though, many people have come back from financial ruin.  Many of the wealthy, well-to-do people we hear about or watch on television or read about in the news, have lost everything and made it back.  Want some names? Walt Disney, Henry Ford, Michael Jackson, to name a few.
What will be your legacy?  Will you start over? Will you try again?  These people did.
Financial fitness is not rocket science, just like exercise is not rocket science.  In exercise you have choices: join a gym, pay monthly or annual fees, and work out before or after work.  Hey, you can even work out during your lunch time. You may choose not to join a gym and do your own thing.  I walk 30 minutes, three times per week. Oh I'm not talking about leisurely walks in the park, I'm talking sweat drenched, fancy sneaker-wearing, bug spray from head to toe because I live in Florida types of walks.  Whatever it takes to keep the weight off.
Just so in financial fitness. You should save a portion of your paycheck, whether its $5.00 or 5%.  There really are no excuses.  You do not need to worry about financial charts, quantitative easing, or portfolio diversification.  Don't use that as an excuse. You can save whether you work at a burger joint or whether you manage a Fortune 500 company.  That's the great thing about America: it's really up to you, no excuses.  I know, some people are born in the negative, products of a bad start because of where they live or the circumstances under which they were born.  It doesn't matter, choose.  Choose to be financially fit.  Just like exercise, it will pay off in the long run.

http://www.thesunsfinancialdiary.com/personal-finance/5-famous-people-beat-bankruptcy/

Warning Signs

I don't know about you, but many of the problems and issues I have faced in my life were preceded by warning signs.  It did not matter how major or minor the problem was, when I look back, I saw the warning signs. In some, well most cases, I ignored the signs or just missed them all together.  In fact, I can tell you in which problems I missed the signs and in which problems I ignored the signs.
You may see yourself in some of the following examples, either way, take this as a warning sign.  I have visited the country of Belize many times.  I love it there and look forward to another trip some time in the future.  On my last trip I lost a watch that I liked very much.  The issue?  I was warned that I could lose the watch.  How?  The clasp had been loose for quite some time.  I 'kept meaning to fix it' but never got around to it.  I can even tell you where I believe it fell off of my hand.  It was in the airport, the day of my arrival.  I reached back to grab my luggage and as I sat in the taxi driving away from the airport I realized my watch was gone.  I had that watch for about eight  years before I lost it due to ignoring the signs.  I have since purchased another watch, same brand, prettier; but I often think not so much of the watch, but about the warning signs.
If you are anything like me, you probably have similar stories.  The watch story was about ignoring the signs, let me give you an example of missing the signs.  Missing signs typically happen due to naivete or ignorance.  Sometimes missing the signs happen when you just want something so badly.  You know what I mean.  That person you really had no business dating--or marrying or that loan or business decision you just had a bad feeling about. 
The warning signs are all around us.  Some people call them 'that first mind', that 'gut feeling', or for those of us who are Christians, The Holy Spirit speaking to us.  Well, God does speak to His children.  He does warn us in our spirit against certain decisions, situations, or people; but he leaves the final decision to us.
The next time you see a warning sign, don't ignore or miss it.  Listen and take heed, or pay the price.  Yes, there is always a price to pay whether the warning sign was missed or ignored. "And Samuel said, Hath the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams." II Samuel 15:22.  Please read the entire chapter, it really gives you the opportunity to see how important it is not to ignore or miss signs.  In fact, this story shows us how detrimental missing or ignoring signs can be--even unto death.  Its just not worth it to ignore or miss warning signs.  Keep your heart and your eyes open and listen.
Life is short, pay attention to the warning signs!  
 

Do not idle

When I was a kid growing up in Dorchester, Mass., just outside of Boston; my Mom used to send me to the grocery store.  Sometimes I went by myself and sometimes she made me take my little sister which of course annoyed me.  But without fail, every time she sent me to the store she said 'do not idle.'  One day I asked her what 'idle' meant, and she said that it meant I was not to stop at my friends house or even stop on the side walk to chit chat. I was not to stop at the corner store to buy candy or chips. I was not allowed to let anyone stop me from my errand: going to the store, or coming back from the store.
Well, I wasn't a perfect kid, but I wasn't an idler.  I think it had something to do with being the oldest of five.  I was given more responsibilities and more was expected of me.  I was blamed if the house wasn't clean when my parents got home from work for instance. So of course I was what my siblings called 'bossy'!  The nerve of those people!
Alas, I digress! 
Idle.  Do you know that as adults we can and do idle? Another word for idle could be procrastinate, putting things off until another time, after time, after time.  Then before you know it a year has gone by, two years, five years, 10 year, then 20! By which time you have compiled a wish list of things you believe are now too late to start or finish. 
I have good news for you!  As long as you are alive you have a chance.  Stop making excuses.  I took classes online: one of the most difficult ways to attend school, with people who were doing the same thing while taking care of small children and working full time.  In fact, when you obtain or achieve a goal later in life, it means more to you.  You cherish it more. 
Stop waiting for some day, tomorrow, Monday, January; when your kids are older...there will never be a perfect time.  Sit down, count the costs: "For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it?"
Luke 14:28.  In other words, use common sense; which you probably have more of as you experience life, but do not use 'circumstances' as an excuse.  
Step out, or as the hymn says, launch out into the deep.  Because any fisherman will tell you, the fish are out in the deep, all you get in the shallows is mud and muck. 
Do not idle.

Make your way through

There's a saying that 'you're either coming out of a problem, in the middle of a problem, or just heading into a problem.'  I don't know who said it, but I find it to be true.  I've also heard that the way you handle a problem will determine how long you stay in the problem.  If you dwell in negativity and a bad attitude, the problem will hang around longer than if you decide that this issue will not get the best of you.  No matter how bad things seem, if you push through and tell yourself that 'this too shall pass', that attitude will bring you through faster. If you allow bitterness, fear, or hatred, to get even a toehold into your situation, your situation can become exponentially worse.

Please realize that the troubles I am talking about are not problems such as a minor fender bender on the way to work, being a few dollars short and being days from pay day, or co-workers that get on your nerves.  These are things that you can deal with, or make work, even to God's glory.  No, I'm talking about issues so serious that it seems your entire life has or will change because of this issue.  Most of us had a general plan for our lives, plans so general that we all assumed, and took for granted that these plans would come to pass.  But what happens when we realize our lives will not happen the way we expected or hoped?  How will we handle these realizations, and how will we live the life we have been given?  How will we play the hand we have been dealt?

We all have the ability to make choices.  We all have the opportunity to choose positively or negatively what we will do when life does not work out in the way we expected.  We can allow ourselves to become and remain stuck in a place of bitterness or hatred, or we can decide to live a blessed and positive life even if it is not the life we wanted.  Decide.  Decision.  Most of us know what the word decision means.  We know how to spell it without much difficulty, it is a word that is used by most of the general population; but I took the liberty of looking up the definition on Bing.com. Decision=process of choosing: the process of coming to a conclusion or determination about something.  So there were three definitions on Bing.com.  This is the third definition and I preferred it to the other two definitions because it seemed more definite to me.  After all, once you come to a decision on most things in life, it is difficult to change your mind without some level of difficulty, otherwise it wasn't much of an issue to begin with.  My opinion.

When you come to a conclusion or determination that you will not allow bitterness or any other negative emotion to become the norm in your life, you have made a decision.  And it was a good decision.  I do not like to use the word ugly to describe anyone because we are all made in the image of God.  I do not believe there are any physically ugly people.  I do believe however, that negative emotions can make people ugly.  If you decide to allow bitterness, hatred, envy, backbiting, backstabbing, or any negative emotion or act to take up residence in you, you will become that emotion.  Those emotions are ugly. 

If you decide to push through whatever issues brought you to these emotions, even if you must live with those issues or problems your entire life, you do not have to live with those emotions.  Don't stay there, don't dwell there, make your way through.  If you do this, all of the negative emotions must go.  They can't hang around where they are not used. 
Hang in there and allow God to make all your crooked ways straight. 

How do you make decisions?

How do you make decisions?  Sometimes the decision-making process is as important as the decision itself.  I'm not referring to the daily decisions we make such as which route to take to work, what to have for breakfast, or even if we should have regular or decaf.  Now you know whether you should be drinking decaf or no coffee at all for that matter, but even the wrong decision is a decison.
Then there are decisions that you should make with extra care.  You should take time, not because of  indecision, but because the result of your decision will be with you for the rest of your life.  When it is time to make an important decision and you find yourself in the process, there are several things that will help you make that correct decision.  
You may view the decision from many vantage points such as where you are in life, where you have been, and where you would like to be.  You may also seek assistance through books, articles, and even websites devoted to the decision making process.  With all of these resources at your disposal, how important do you think it is to make the right decision? Oh, there is one other thing on the list. Prayer.  I believe prayer is the most important of these decision-making resources. 
The thing with prayer though, is that you must listen for the answer.  Scary thought huh?  Scary because the answer may not be what you want to hear.  So if you pray, which I suggest you do, be prepared to comply.  Even in the 'no', God has a reason that you may or may not ever know.  Either way, make the right decision because you have to live with it for the rest of your life.




Life/Religion

What are you doing?

I am often asked if I have more books coming and the fact is, I have several book projects in the pipeline but they are on hold, except one.  Funny though, the one I have brought to the forefront is proving to be difficult to write. Granted I am trying to write it while working full time and heading back to school to obtain a graduate degree.  My first book took just under a year to write and it was written under much easier circumstances.  I kept a schedule of writing four hours per day until the book was written, and then I put it down for a few years. The manuscript sat gathering dust because I was not ready to publish.  "Down Again" was finally published and is available on Amazon.com or via my website at www.civillamorgan.com.   
The book I'm writing now is all over the place, or as I like to say, discombobulated.  I am working on several chapters at a time, there are  peices of chapters here and there, I can't seem to get it together.  However, it's a book I need to write because it will help a portion of society that goes largely ignored and misunderstood.  As we all know, most people tend to ignore what they do not understand, hoping if they look in the opposite direction the issue or problem would just go away.  Some of us however, are not afraid to walk down the road less taken.  We are not afraid to stand up for people who cannot stand up for themselves, or defend the people who are too broken to defend themselves.  We defend even when we are made fun of, ridiculed, and cursed.  I would even dare to say people like us are fearless. Hey, there's only one life to live, why live it on the fence? I've heard that 'if you don't stand for something you will fall for anything'--Unknown.  I don't plan on falling for anything.
So yes, I am at this moment working on a book. Even when I am not working on it, I'm working on it.  It's always on my mind: morning, noon, and night.  I believe it will be until it's finished.  That's ok, I am up to the task. 
What are you working on? What should you be working on? Life is short, no one should have to prompt you to do what you know you should be doing.         



Life

Money makes the world go round

We all know how the current financial conditions have affected almost everyone in our country and around the world.  People have lost jobs, homes, cars, and savings.  Life looks bleak and for some there will be no way to recoup their losses, at least not to what they had before the financial nightmare happened.  Most people believe the financial breakdown started in 2008  and I would agree, to a point. The financial breakdown showed its face to us in 2008 but it did not begin in 2008. 
Like any problem or issue in life such as the current financial conditions, they do not just pop up, or 'happen'.  Bad things were happening long before 2008.  Mortgage brokers and bankers were approving bad loans long before 2008.  Buyers were shopping for and being approved for homes they really could not afford, and the stock market, well the stock market was just going through a typical cycle. 
The fact is, everything, including life, is cyclical.  If you are old enough to look back over the last 20 or 30 years of your life you will see that even your individual life was cyclical.  You made it through the tough times that occurred even when those tough times happened at the hand of someone other than yourself.  The financial loss you may have suffered since 2008, made you either sink or swim.  If you swam and did not sink, it should have taught you how to 'live a new normal'.  What is a new normal? Learning to live on quite a bit less than you used to, and appreciating the fact that you have a job.  This includes having to live without certain  things that you may have previously taken for granted, and having the best possible attitude about your changed situation.

The fact is, there may be days when you may feel sorry for yourself, but you get over it and keep pushing through until things turn around.  You learn how to brew your own coffee at home instead of stopping for that daily $4 cup on the way to work.  You learn how to make your own lunch instead of paying between $5 and $10 per day for lunch. You play little games like treating yourself to lunch once or twice per month or buying yourself a little treat here and there to help you keep your chin up.
Two important thing to do during this time though, is to never give up and to keep putting something away for yourself in savings and in retirement.  It sounds crazy because you may have just lost everything, but the fact is, life goes on.  You cannot make the excuse 20 or 30 years from now that you could not save anything because there was a crash in 2008.  You may have been able to save $5,000.00 per year before your life crashed and can now only save $2,000, $1,000.00, or even $500.00. You cannot live off the crash of 2008, you cannot live off of the pitfalls of life,  but you can live off of doing the best you can with what you have left.  And who knows, because just like the market, life is cyclical, your new normal may be the best thing that ever happened to you.


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 In my final post at Examinercom, I wrote an article entitled 'When God says no'. In that article I discussed the fact that sometimes God's answer to our prayers is 'no'. We pray for years; hoping, having faith, only to find at the end of say, 15 years, that the answer to our prayer is no. That means it has been no all along. Well, that's one way of looking at the situation. Sometimes God allows negative situations in our lives because he wants to strengthen us through the situation. Sometimes negative situations happen in our lives because it is just life. In either case, we must hang on to the promise that Jesus loves us and he will not allow any more than we can bear even when it does not feel that way. I don't know about you, but I sometimes feel like the things I have gone through were grounding me to dust, not strengthening me. The fact is though, I am still here so I was not ground to dust. I do have a better understanding of how Job felt though. You trust God, you know everything you have: your family, land, and riches, are all from God, but suddenly everything is taken away. In Job's case his children are killed, his livestock is killed, he suffers financial loss, and physical debilitation. How could that be when he was living right, doing all the right things? Then to top it off, the people that he thought would be there for him were not. His wife told him to curse God and die and his friends were convinced it was something he did that caused this tragic turn of events in his life. Well, we all have a choice as to how we will react to the unexpected tragedies in our lives. I don't think God minds that we question him when we are 'going through'. In fact I believe we should keep praying, even when we do not feel like it. The last few months have been quite difficult for me and I did not really feel like talking to God about the situation, I wanted to withdraw until I could get a grip on the reality of my situation. When tragedy happens, the healing process takes time, it always does. Everyone deals with life in different ways. We should not stay away from God but instead draw closer to him. When we have suffered loss, been broken, or even ground to dust, it helps to look at other people's situations. When I think about what I have gone through I think about people, Christians, who have suffered loss as well. How have they dealt with loss? How do they live with it? I watched an interview with a scientist/doctor who talked about Oscar Pistorious, the double amputee who made it all the way to the Olympic semi-finals in track. The scientist said that 'Oscar's not broken, he is perfect.' Regardless of what we have been through, what we have lost; we are not broken, we are perfect. We need to trust that God knows what he is doing and in the meantime allow ourselves to heal. By the way, reading the book of Job will put things in perspective too.