Embouchure

Embouchure, what is it? If you played a woodwind instrument in middle or high school, or even now, you know what it is. If you play or played guitar, you know what it is.  I can hear some guitar players right now, ‘I don’t know what that is.’  Give me a minute, you will.

I played alto saxophone, my junior year of high school.  I was not that great, but my dad thought getting me involved in band would somehow make me well-rounded.  Some of you may not be shocked by this, but as hard as I tried, I never fit in.  It was hard for me to make friends.  I don‘t know how much music helped, I was in marching band and stage band, maybe it did a little.

Next time you see someone playing a saxophone or any other wood wind instrument, look at their bottom lip.  Notice how it is curved back over the musician’s bottom row of teeth.  Ever imagine how painful that might be? Me either, until I started taking saxophone lessons.   I tried everything not to suffer the pain of my bottom row of teeth cutting into the inside of my bottom lip.   Webster’s Dictionary defines an embouchure as ‘1. The mouthpiece of a wind instrument. 2. The way in which the lips are applied to an embouchure to produce a musical tone.’

One day at practice, my saxophone teacher caught me red-handed! He was an elderly gentleman and he had probably seen this a million times.  I had folded a sheet of paper towel into a small square, and put it inside my bottom lip.  Bottom line, no pun intended, he said that I could not do that; it would not allow me to play the instrument properly.  Yes, it was pretty gross as I removed the piece of paper and tossed it into the trash. I proceeded to build my embouchure.

And build it I did.  I built a callous on the inside of my bottom lip which allowed me to properly play the alto saxophone.  Yes guitar players, the same callouses you build on your fingertips, are what woodwind instrument players build on the inside of their bottom lip. 

In life, we need to build a callous.  We do not build a callous as a way to become hard-hearted, heartless, or mean; but to strengthen us against the relentless waves of life.  Life can be horrible, mean, and downright disrespectful.  You know the saying, ‘we will either sink or swim’, or what about this saying, ‘if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything’.   I don’t know who the originators of these sayings are, but they have continued down through time because they are true!  We need to build up our strength to do battle against the wiles of the devil and the craziness of life.  When we are weak, we fall for anything, we allow life to assail us and sink us.  If we allow ourselves to be strengthened, to build our embouchure, we will have a better chance of surviving our journey through life. 

I played saxophone for the senior graduation march or procession, that year.  The music for the graduation procession is pretty easy, although I probably could not play it now.  The callous inside my bottom lip is gone now too.  It took some time to disappear actually.  But I have a nice healthy one that I have built up over time, for the craziness of life.  Yes, life can hit us out of left field.  Life can send us reeling in a downward spiral.  But I am convinced a proper embouchure, and a healthy callous, will help us survive.       

What if?

Life is about choices.  We choose to take risks or we choose to live under the radar.  There is no middle ground, no straddling the fence.  We either risk applying for that promotion, or we sit in the same seat year after year.  We either risk asking that person on a date, or we wonder ‘what if?’ We either write that book or we dream about writing that book.  We dream about taking that vacation, or opening that business we think about every day; or we just exist until we die.

They say the cemeteries are filled with unrealized dreams.  We will one day become one of those unrealized dreams or we can take the risk.  What drives risk takers, what pushes us to take the risk? It’s that voice in our head and our gut that says ‘I don’t want to turn 90 and find myself sitting in my rocking chair wondering ‘what if?’  Don’t get me wrong, an integral part of taking risks is failing.  I believe that is what keeps many people from taking risks.  What if you ask her out and she says no?  What if you apply for that job or promotion and someone less qualified gets it?  What if you did not conduct the proper research before opening your business or maybe you did, and it fails within two years of opening?  What if you just break even on that book you decided to publish?  Hey, what if you take that dream vacation and you come back with a stomach virus or worse? 

But what if you succeed? What if you succeed beyond your wildest dreams?  What if you have the vacation of a lifetime with memories you will cherish forever?  What if the success of your book is that it touched one soul, or 10, or 10,000?  What if it takes your business three times before it is successful.  And in the meantime you have to work for someone else during the day and work on your business at night, until it is successful?  What if the person you asked out said no and then you met the person of your dreams?  Risk, what if?

Many years ago, I worked for a brokerage firm for more than a decade.  The last seven of those 11 years I was a Registered Representative—aka a stock broker.  It took me several years to get to that level, and I have to say I loved my job.  I loved, and still love, the energy of the stock market.  But some days I hated my job!  I would find myself staring out the window, wondering ‘what if?’  Then the layoffs happened. 250 of us in one day!  My life changed immensely after that day.  I vowed never to go back into the world of finance and thought I would try the healthcare industry. 

My first job in the healthcare industry, an entry level position, I lasted two and half years.  Then I was fired!  I was taking too much time with the patients.  I had never been fired before! The next employment opportunity, same job different company, I took that entry level position again; hoping to get in and move up in the company.  I seriously wanted to; thought I would, stay there until retirement! I tried for six years to move up, but to no avail.  I sat in an entry level position making thousands less than I had made as a broker, but thankful for a job.  We all know the stories of how many people are under-employed.  After six years however, I could not take it anymore.  I resigned.  It was now or never. 

The months preceding my resignation, that was all I heard, ‘it’s now or never!’  I heard it in church sermons and conversations with strangers who did not know my situation.  Everywhere I turned, I heard the warning, ‘it’s now or never’.  I kept thinking ‘I have to do this.  I may never get another chance’.  But I would push the thought out of my mind because it just was not practical.  It was not the right time!             

Well, here I am.  I’m working at my ‘what if’.  Is it scary? Yes it is!  Do I sometimes hear the voice in my head asking me if I’m crazy? Yes.  Do I ask myself what about being prepared for retirement?  Definitely! Suppose! Suppose, suppose, suppose!? What response do I give myself? ‘I know, suppose, but what if?’

Listen all about it!