21st Century Hannah on air again on Monday February 16th!

Coming Out

What is the first thing you think about when you hear that phrase, that sentence, ‘coming out’?  Here in America, when someone makes the decision to come out, they are telling their family, friends, and the world; that they have made the decision to live their lifestyle out loud.  They are no longer willing to hide and pretend.  They have decided to live their life in its truest form.

Why profess to be a Christian, a believer, and then hide your beliefs when you are not at church?  Your friends and co-workers do not even know you are a Believer.  You bless your meal at home, but not when you are at a restaurant.  You blend in.  You believe it’s best to go along to get along, especially in the age and time in which we live where every religion except Christianity is accepted. 

I am not saying you need to have your Bible open on your desk at work, not getting your work done, because you want to be ‘in The Word’.  That’s what breaks and lunches are for.  When you are at work, work comes first.  God is not the author of confusion, his word also says if you do not work you do not eat.  ‘For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: “The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.”--2 Thessalonians 3:10.  NIV—New International Version.  This tells me, we had better find and do our job, our work.    

It is not necessary to walk around your job, or around town shouting down the roof top that you are a Believer.  Your boss might not appreciate that too much, he may just want you to do your work.  But do you laugh at those jokes you know you should not laugh at, just to fit in?  Are you living the life God wants you to live?  Are you daily growing in your relationship with Christ? Are you living one way in church and another way ‘on your own time’? Do your co-workers know for a fact that they should not tell certain jokes around you or invite you to certain places after work, on a Friday night?  And even if they do, just to try to press your buttons, what is your reaction? 

What exactly do you stand for?  Do you know?  We are living in a time where everyone is living exactly the type of life they want to.  No one is hiding anymore, people are coming out.  Are you coming out or staying in? 

Are you serious?

Sometimes I think about the state of Christianity in the West.  Actually, I think about it a lot.  I may step on some toes, but I want us to take a personal accounting.  I get upset when Christians refuse to grow.  We actually feel we are OK. 

Recently I was listening to a show where a former terrorist who became a Christian, was talking about his faith in Christ.  He had become a Christian!  His face was concealed because he could be killed if he were recognized.  Do you understand the risk? They concealed his face because he could be killed! 

In the meantime, we continue to sit in our comfortable pews Sunday after Sunday, and we do not change.  We continue to keep ugliness, resentment, even hate, in our hearts.  We gossip, we start rumors, and we jostle for church position. All of this as we listen to the pastor tell us how a relationship with Christ is so important.  Seemingly not connecting the dots. 

There are Christian missionaries around the world, in very dangerous places, with their lives on the line daily.  Some of them are in jails around the world.  But we’re ok with straddling the fence, fitting in, jumping on bandwagons we have no business being on; only calling on God when we find ourselves in an emergency situation. 

How does God feel about this?  We will have to make a decision.  Not just an in the moment, sitting in the church pew decision, although that’s a start.  But a decision where we ask God to forgive us.  A decision where we tell him we believe and trust in him, and that we want to grow in him.  We can continue trying to fool ourselves that we are OK, because we live in a Christian nation with the greatest military on earth.  But none of that means anything, if we the Christians, are not praying for our country.  It means nothing if we are not praying for our military.  It means nothing if we refuse to grow in relationship with Christ.  It means nothing if we pray only when we have to.  And it means nothing if we continually straddle the fence. 

There is no earthly relationship where we can straddle the fence, reach out to the other person only when we need something; or just to use that person.  How long would such a relationship last before the other person asked us for an accounting, or just ended the ‘relationship’? I have one question: Are you serious?

Reminder, 21st Century Hannah is coming, reminder to finalize your New Years Resolution

No!

Years ago, when I applied for a job or promotion, asked a friend a favor, or just asked for something in general; if the answer was ‘no’, my feelings would be hurt and I would wonder what I did.  I really thought it was about me.  Well, as we get older, we realize the world does not revolve around us, that it is not always about us.  Indeed, ‘no’ can sometimes be the best response we could receive!

We look back years later and realize that ‘no’ worked in our favor, whether it was that job for which we applied or that wedding that never happened when you just knew he was ‘the one’; we look up to the skies and say ‘thank you Jesus!’  I believe that as Christians, when we’re living our best and doing our best on a daily basis, ‘no’ is good even when the person saying it thinks they are getting us back for whatever reason.  Regardless of the ‘no’, God’s got us.  He will make that ‘no’ work in our favor.  We have to believe that and not fight needlessly for things that we should hand over to God.  Some people call it Karma, some call it fate, some call it life; but I prefer to believe God’s got us.   

These days, when people say ‘no’, if it is a situation where I can ask for feedback I will, such as a job interview or promotion request.  Sometimes the feedback helps us for future interviews or endeavors.  But generally I say ‘thank you’, and keep moving.  I do not allow ‘no’ to stop me in my tracks mentally, physically, or emotionally.  Everyone is dealing with something, everyone is experiencing life.  It’s not about me.  These days, ‘no’ means ask someone else, try something else, have a plan B.  ‘No’ means think outside the box to get your ‘yes’.  ‘No’ means that your request may not even be the correct path, maybe you are headed down the wrong road. 

We cannot allow ‘no’ to stop us because life will continue with or without us.  Yes, there are some ‘no’s’ that are harsh, hurtful, and willful.  But that’s because hurt people hurt people, unless they are mature enough to set their hurts aside, and properly handle the issue at hand.  Most people are not that mature.  Sorry.  That’s life. 

There is a story in the Bible that I think about when I get a ‘no’. 'The king of Sodom said to Abram, Give me the people and keep the goods for yourself.” But Abram said to the king of Sodom, “With raised hand I have sworn an oath to the Lord, God Most High, Creator of heaven and earth, that I will accept nothing belonging to you, not even a thread or the strap of a sandal, so that you will never be able to say, ‘I made Abram rich.’ Genesis 14:21-23.  As I mentioned earlier, we can become upset with ‘no’, but sometimes ‘no’ protects us from wrong intentions.  You see, as the story above depicts, sometimes ‘yes’ can come with ulterior motives or strings attached. 

When you get a ‘no’, have the right attitude. Don’t fight, don’t get upset.  God’s got you. He has all the right yes’s.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls!

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls! I haven’t been to a circus in years, but from what I recall, those are the words the master of ceremonies typically uses to open up the circus right?  At any rate, this post is for everyone; ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. 

1)  Boys, many of you do not have a good father figure, but you can still make the decision to live your best life ever.    
2)   Girls, just because a boy says he loves you, it does not mean he does.  Use your common sense.  Every boy you sleep with when you are a girl, and every man you sleep with when you are a woman, leaves his mark on you emotionally and sometimes physically.

3)  Men, bullying is not the correct way to ‘get a girl’.

4)  Ladies, no matter how good you look on the outside, your beauty will fade.  Fill your brain with an education: college, trade school, etc.  Be positive, be sincere, and self-fulfilling.  Be good to yourself.  That will make you even more beautiful than you already are.

5)  Boys, while you are young, work on your craft. Go to college or trade school.  Learn how to cook and do laundry.  When you know how to do these things, you can take your time in finding the right woman.  In fact, God will direct you to the right woman.  In the mean time, know how to cook and do laundry!  

6) Girls, saying you can’t cook and that you and your husband can eat out every day, is not cute.  In fact, I guarantee you after a few years of marriage it will get old! Learn how to cook and do laundry.  If for nothing else, when you know how to cook, you can control the amount of fat and calories in your food.

7) Men, if you are interested in a woman, talk to her.  Hiding behind other people may be cute when you’re a boy, but as a man, it’s just not cute.  If she says yes, great! If she says no, move on gracefully.  Acting like a jerk because a woman says no, tells us a lot about you, including that you may not be stable!     

8) Ladies, if you chase after a man, which you should not be doing, and he says no; be graceful about it.  If you are not, he will know for sure that he made the right decision.  He will think you are not stable!  Stop stalking the man!    

9)  Girls, I know they make and sell daisy dukes in the store, but in my observation, no one looks good in them.  What type of man do you think you will attract when you wear those things out of the house.  It’s not cute girls.  Daisy Dukes are not long-term relationship attracting clothes.  Stop it!  That goes for you too ladies!  Seriously!  

10)  Men, if you don’t know how to ask a lady out, do some research on how!  Hey, do some research on how to deal with acceptance and rejection.  No one likes rejection, but it happens to us all.  Have some class guys and dolls! 

11) Women, dress as well as you can afford to, get out of the house, join a club, and meet people.  All of those things are great.  But acting needy and pushy, not cute.

Finally, as human beings, we will find ourselves attracted to the opposite sex.  That’s how God made us.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with it.  It’s NORMAL!  How we interact with each other seems to be the problem.  Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, do your homework.  Don’t leave life to chance.  There is so much information available that even if you do not have a positive role model in your life, you can still find the information you need to keep it simple.  

Those who are Christians, search for a good church.  You will have to do some visiting.  Not every church is the same.  There is nothing wrong with visiting until you find the one God has for you.  He will direct your steps.  Just as he will direct you to the man or woman he has for you!

   

When you find a good church, see what groups and departments are available that match your God-given gifts, and get involved.  When you put God first, he will take care of the rest.  There may be the occasional, um, person who has not done their research, but do not allow yourself to be bullied or chased.  Ladies, do not wear Daisy Dukes to church! 

Seriously, folks, let God direct you in every aspect of your life.  He does not make mistakes, even when you feel like his timing is way off, he’s got you in the palm of his hands.     

White paper

I have been planning my strategy for quite some time now. What do I say? How much do I say, when? Then, in November I made the life-changing decision to quit my job. I had never done anything like that before. I have been laid off after 11 years of service, and I have been fired…once, after two and half years of service.  Neither event was particularly pleasing, but it is all part of life. You roll with the punches, sink or swim.  But to walk away from a job, a paying gig, it was one of the scariest moments of my life.  I walked away because although I had and have, bills to pay, it was now or never.  I planned, freshened up my social networking sites, did everything I could to be ready.

Ready for what? Ready to step into the role I believe God prepared for me, or maybe it’s prepared me for. I have often heard people say that if they had to go through their particular adversity again, they would.  They would not change a thing.  I am not of the same opinion, and I do not foresee changing my mind about this. 

You see, well, let’s first define the term ‘white paper’:

 'An informational document issued by a company to promote or highlight the features of a solution, product or service.  White papers are sales and marketing documents used to entice or persuade potential customers to learn more about or purchase a particular product, service, technology or methodology.  White papers are designed to be used as a marketing tool before a sale, and not as a user manual or other technical document developed to provide support to the user after making a purchase.' (Investopedia.com).       

Well, I hardly feel that I am ‘persuading potential customers…’, but more like I am providing ‘an informational document issued…to promote or highlight the features of a solution…’ In my case reaching out to a particular segment of society.  A segment of society that we do not hear much about.  Why do I have to explain what I am doing? Well, I do not really have to explain.    I want the segment of society, the women that I am speaking to, to understand.  To understand that I understand, what they are going through because I have been through the same thing.

What is that? I want to encourage women of all ages who cannot/could not, have children.  Maybe it’s me, but have you ever noticed that people start to squirm whenever that subject does not come up?  People are not sure what to say when you tell them you do not have children.  There is an uncomfortable lull in the conversation, and then you can see their brain working on an exit strategy from the conversation, from you.  Others say silly things like ‘children are overrated’, or ‘you can have mine, they’re a pain’.  Most people are joking, but it’s just not funny.  It would be better to say ‘I’m sorry’, or say nothing.  I plan on speaking to the hurting heart of childlessness, giving a voice to the pain. Why?  Because I believe when you give voice to your fears, your losses, your pain; although that pain might not completely go away, it becomes less ominous.  I plan to help make the pain less ominous.

My white paper, then, is to help childless women realize that they, we, are as relevant to society as women with children.  I want to be the ‘marketing tool’ in the ‘white paper’.  We are not filler, existing on the fringe of society.  We are not bitter, hateful or weird.  Trust me, I have heard it all.  

Unfortunately some people will see my ‘white paper’, my mission, as a threat.  They will draw their children closer when I enter the room, or they may make veiled remarks of feeling threatened.  Please know that if my message is not for you, it’s OK.  I know for a fact that there are millions of women around the world for whom this message will resonate.  I also believe that there are also millions of men and women around the world who are open-minded enough, and not feeling threatened, to want to understand.  I applaud you and thank you.  I look forward to helping others better understand that we all have different fears, losses, and pain.  But we can overcome these facts of life enough, to live a relevant and joy-filled life.