Embouchure

Embouchure, what is it? If you played a woodwind instrument in middle or high school, or even now, you know what it is. If you play or played guitar, you know what it is.  I can hear some guitar players right now, ‘I don’t know what that is.’  Give me a minute, you will.

I played alto saxophone, my junior year of high school.  I was not that great, but my dad thought getting me involved in band would somehow make me well-rounded.  Some of you may not be shocked by this, but as hard as I tried, I never fit in.  It was hard for me to make friends.  I don‘t know how much music helped, I was in marching band and stage band, maybe it did a little.

Next time you see someone playing a saxophone or any other wood wind instrument, look at their bottom lip.  Notice how it is curved back over the musician’s bottom row of teeth.  Ever imagine how painful that might be? Me either, until I started taking saxophone lessons.   I tried everything not to suffer the pain of my bottom row of teeth cutting into the inside of my bottom lip.   Webster’s Dictionary defines an embouchure as ‘1. The mouthpiece of a wind instrument. 2. The way in which the lips are applied to an embouchure to produce a musical tone.’

One day at practice, my saxophone teacher caught me red-handed! He was an elderly gentleman and he had probably seen this a million times.  I had folded a sheet of paper towel into a small square, and put it inside my bottom lip.  Bottom line, no pun intended, he said that I could not do that; it would not allow me to play the instrument properly.  Yes, it was pretty gross as I removed the piece of paper and tossed it into the trash. I proceeded to build my embouchure.

And build it I did.  I built a callous on the inside of my bottom lip which allowed me to properly play the alto saxophone.  Yes guitar players, the same callouses you build on your fingertips, are what woodwind instrument players build on the inside of their bottom lip. 

In life, we need to build a callous.  We do not build a callous as a way to become hard-hearted, heartless, or mean; but to strengthen us against the relentless waves of life.  Life can be horrible, mean, and downright disrespectful.  You know the saying, ‘we will either sink or swim’, or what about this saying, ‘if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything’.   I don’t know who the originators of these sayings are, but they have continued down through time because they are true!  We need to build up our strength to do battle against the wiles of the devil and the craziness of life.  When we are weak, we fall for anything, we allow life to assail us and sink us.  If we allow ourselves to be strengthened, to build our embouchure, we will have a better chance of surviving our journey through life. 

I played saxophone for the senior graduation march or procession, that year.  The music for the graduation procession is pretty easy, although I probably could not play it now.  The callous inside my bottom lip is gone now too.  It took some time to disappear actually.  But I have a nice healthy one that I have built up over time, for the craziness of life.  Yes, life can hit us out of left field.  Life can send us reeling in a downward spiral.  But I am convinced a proper embouchure, and a healthy callous, will help us survive.       

What if?

Life is about choices.  We choose to take risks or we choose to live under the radar.  There is no middle ground, no straddling the fence.  We either risk applying for that promotion, or we sit in the same seat year after year.  We either risk asking that person on a date, or we wonder ‘what if?’ We either write that book or we dream about writing that book.  We dream about taking that vacation, or opening that business we think about every day; or we just exist until we die.

They say the cemeteries are filled with unrealized dreams.  We will one day become one of those unrealized dreams or we can take the risk.  What drives risk takers, what pushes us to take the risk? It’s that voice in our head and our gut that says ‘I don’t want to turn 90 and find myself sitting in my rocking chair wondering ‘what if?’  Don’t get me wrong, an integral part of taking risks is failing.  I believe that is what keeps many people from taking risks.  What if you ask her out and she says no?  What if you apply for that job or promotion and someone less qualified gets it?  What if you did not conduct the proper research before opening your business or maybe you did, and it fails within two years of opening?  What if you just break even on that book you decided to publish?  Hey, what if you take that dream vacation and you come back with a stomach virus or worse? 

But what if you succeed? What if you succeed beyond your wildest dreams?  What if you have the vacation of a lifetime with memories you will cherish forever?  What if the success of your book is that it touched one soul, or 10, or 10,000?  What if it takes your business three times before it is successful.  And in the meantime you have to work for someone else during the day and work on your business at night, until it is successful?  What if the person you asked out said no and then you met the person of your dreams?  Risk, what if?

Many years ago, I worked for a brokerage firm for more than a decade.  The last seven of those 11 years I was a Registered Representative—aka a stock broker.  It took me several years to get to that level, and I have to say I loved my job.  I loved, and still love, the energy of the stock market.  But some days I hated my job!  I would find myself staring out the window, wondering ‘what if?’  Then the layoffs happened. 250 of us in one day!  My life changed immensely after that day.  I vowed never to go back into the world of finance and thought I would try the healthcare industry. 

My first job in the healthcare industry, an entry level position, I lasted two and half years.  Then I was fired!  I was taking too much time with the patients.  I had never been fired before! The next employment opportunity, same job different company, I took that entry level position again; hoping to get in and move up in the company.  I seriously wanted to; thought I would, stay there until retirement! I tried for six years to move up, but to no avail.  I sat in an entry level position making thousands less than I had made as a broker, but thankful for a job.  We all know the stories of how many people are under-employed.  After six years however, I could not take it anymore.  I resigned.  It was now or never. 

The months preceding my resignation, that was all I heard, ‘it’s now or never!’  I heard it in church sermons and conversations with strangers who did not know my situation.  Everywhere I turned, I heard the warning, ‘it’s now or never’.  I kept thinking ‘I have to do this.  I may never get another chance’.  But I would push the thought out of my mind because it just was not practical.  It was not the right time!             

Well, here I am.  I’m working at my ‘what if’.  Is it scary? Yes it is!  Do I sometimes hear the voice in my head asking me if I’m crazy? Yes.  Do I ask myself what about being prepared for retirement?  Definitely! Suppose! Suppose, suppose, suppose!? What response do I give myself? ‘I know, suppose, but what if?’

Listen all about it!

Sea of voices

Have you ever been at a large gathering, typically Sunday morning church service, and the entire congregation is reading scripture or repeating a prayer? I think most people are subconsciously listening to their own voice, thinking ‘I don’t like my voice’. I don’t like to hear my voice either. It doesn’t seem to blend in with everyone else’s. Maybe that’s how it is for everyone. But have you ever stopped to listen to all of the voices? The unison but at the same time the differences. The male voices and the female voices. The young voices and the old voices. It sounds awesome doesn’t it?

Do you ever wonder what God hears when he hears our voices? Can you imagine the number of voices he hears on a Sunday morning all around the world? It probably sounds like a sea of voices to him. That’s how I imagine it. A beautiful sea of voices.


But what do you say on the other days? What does God hear when you are not in church? Does he hear negative words and thoughts? Does he hear us ripping each other apart with our lips? Does he hear us ripping ourselves apart? Do the words that come out of our mouths Monday through Saturday match the words that come out on Sunday morning? Do we talk about love on Sunday but use a different set of four letter words on the other days?


Never thought about it? Unfortunately, it’s not something many of us think about on a regular basis. But we should. Now more than ever, we need to be strong in our faith. We need to have the right words and thoughts in our minds at all times. There is so much happening in our daily lives. There are things happening that we never dreamed would. There are wars and rumors of wars. More people around the world are lacking the basic necessities than ever. There is hatred and strife, lack of understanding and empathy, and fear.


But what would our lives, our voices be like, if we speak the way God wants us to? What would happen if we said positive things and remembered his promises? Promises like ‘And the Lord shall make thee the head, and not the tail; and thou shalt be above only, and thou shalt not be beneath; if that thou hearken unto the commandments of the Lord thy God, which I command thee this day, to observe and to do them: And thou shalt not go aside from any of the words which I command thee this day, to the right hand, or to the left, to go after other gods to serve them.’ Deuteronomy 28:12-13. How about remembering God’s blessings on us instead of speaking negatively about ourselves?

What about saying and thinking positive things about people instead of thinking and assuming the worst? Like in Philippians 4:8, ‘Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.’ It’s not easy when people have mistreated us, especially when they have done so on purpose. There are times when we will have to dig deep for the right attitude, the right words, and the right thoughts. But dig deep we must. It will work out better for us in the end. It will be worth it.

I often say that this Christian life is not easy. Many people want us to stop believing the word of God. They want us to give up our beliefs and just blend in. Live and let live you know? Say whatever we want, live however we want, believe whatever we want. But how would our voices sound to God? Our voice may sound weird in our ears, but I believe it must sound like a beautiful addition to the sea of voices he hears? I want my voice to be a part of the sea of voices. How about you?

In the Gap

Many times in the Christian community, when we pray for someone who is not present in the church service, we stand in the gap in prayer for that person.  In proxy.  But what about the people who do not have anyone to pray for them, to stand in the gap for them?  There are many people around the world who need prayer.  They may be Christians who are being killed, or non-Christians who do not know who Jesus is.  They may not even care who he is. 

Every day, people leave for work, their children leave for school, and they did not even thank God for waking them that morning, never mind asking Him to go with them throughout the day.  Many people feel like they are living life under their own steam and do not need any help from above.  It could be too, that they did not do it because they did not know to do it.  Besides, you would have to believe God can really help you to ask right?

And that’s OK, because when they get a revelation that there is a God and that they could rely on him in the good times and the bad, they will talk to him more.  They will pray.  They will rely on God to protect their children from the craziness they face at school every day.  They will rely on him to protect them during their commute, at work, and even in their relationships.  They will get a revelation that it is God who made us, who protects us, who wakes us in the morning and takes us through the day. They will realize that prayer before leaving the house is just as important as a good breakfast!

With everything that is going on in our world, what would be wrong with prayer? 

Well, in the meantime, maybe those of us who are Christians should stand in the gap.  Maybe in addition to praying for our family members we can pray for people around the world.  Maybe we can pray for Christians around the world who are going through things we cannot even imagine.  Maybe we should take a world view of our Christian beliefs, and really pray against all of the unbelievable things that are happening.  I believe we can really stand in the gap for the world. 

Many of us are taught to pray what we call ‘specific prayers’, rather than the typical general or generic prayer.  What should we pray for specifically? We can pray for Christian families who have been uprooted because of their beliefs.  We can pray against the kidnappings of children and women who are being used as sex-slaves.  We can pray against world-wide terrorism.  There is actually quite a bit we can and should be praying about.  As Christians, we cannot afford to pray the simple generic prayers anymore.  Life is no longer that simple.  We must pray for each other around the world.  We cannot afford to pretend that all is well because all is well with us.  We are our brother’s keeper.        

Top 10 life lessons that have gotten me this far…so far...

Top 10 life lessons that have gotten me this far…so far.

I like ‘top 10’ articles.  They make me want to read the article. I mean, at least start to read the article. But at least I want to start. So at any rate, here are the top 10 things I have learned in life to date. I will put them in number order from one to ten, but they are certainly not in a particular order:

1) When shopping for gifts, buy something you would buy yourself.  That is especially cool if you are a really cool person who likes cool stuff.  If you are not an especially sharp dresser or cool person, you better just ask the gift recipient what they want.

2) Pray.  And when you pray, do so expecting a deeper relationship with Christ.  Pray for others, pray for yourself.

3)  Try your best to right a wrong.  My Parents told me that back in their day when someone got saved, became a Christian, they would go through the community telling people; and apologizing to those they hurt. What a novel idea huh?  Not everyone will allow you to right a wrong with them, but at least you tried.

4)  Know you faults.  Contrary to popular belief, we all have them.  We will never be perfect, but we should strive to be better every day. 

5)  Choose your friends wisely.  No one is perfect, so there is no perfect friend, but you know what you will and will not accept.  You should know when people are trying to handle you and when they have their best interests at heart not yours.  Take your time getting to know people. They will eventually show their true colors.  After all, our nature is our nature.

6)  Be kind.  There is no need to look down your nose at people.  Everyone on this planet is on a journey. Everyone has or will go through at least one very difficult period in their life.  When you run into the eye rollers and haters, smile and keep it moving.  I read a meme recently that said ‘don’t try to win over the haters, you are not the jerk whisperer’. Just be kind.

7)  Love your family and friends with all your heart.  Tell them you love them and show them you love them.  Learn their love language and use it.       

8)  Choose your battles.  Not every argument is worth winning.  In fact, not every argument is worth the argument. 

9)  Don’t hate people. Calling people names and miss-treating others based on their race, creed or color is just wrong.  No matter what you call a person, no matter what you were taught about whole groups of people, at the end of the day, we are all human beings.

10) Travel.  I am convinced that when you travel, you are less likely to hate and more likely to understand.

This is by no means a final list, in fact I may post a few more top ten lists throughout the year.  In fact, let me post one more, a little transparency:

11)  Life is short so I tend to think way down the road, over the hill, and around the corner.  In other words, I am a die-hard planner and that drives me crazy about me sometimes, never mind the people in my life.  I wish I had done that when I was much younger though, but I am doing it now.  So it drives me nuts, but I think it’s good, all at the same time. Go figure.  

            Peace!          

Evil eye, side eye

You know the look.  People you don’t know, at least you do not think you know them.  People who look at you like you did something really bad to them, and they are going to get you back somehow.  But you do not know them!  You just know you have never met them before!  You sit for a moment, going backwards in your memory bank, trying to place the name, the face, the name and the face.  But you just cannot place the person.  You cannot place the person because you do not know the person!

Stop hurting your brain muscle trying to place that person.  You really do not know them, and they do not know you.  You may remind them of someone.  You may be wearing a dress or pair of shoes they like.  It is after all, usually the petty little things that wake up the green eyed monster.  But what this person or these people do not know, and what you do not need to tell them, is what you had to go through.

You see, people do not understand, and in many cases will never understand, what you had to go through to get where you are or where you are going.  They do not know that some days you forget to eat because you become so involved in the plan. They do not know that most days you do not lay your head on your pillow until 2 a.m.  They do not know the relationships that have fallen away, relationships you thought would last forever.  Relationships that fell away because you did not or could not nurture them; or because God said ‘no more’, to those relationships.

They see the end results, and they make little guttural noises as they walk by you.  They make little comments that they somehow hope you missed and understood at the same time.  They gossip about you to people who will either think for themselves, or not.  And they keep tabs on you without encouraging you.

But know this: when you set out to follow the plan, whether it is a dream you have always had, or something God told you to do; just do it.  Do it knowing that not everyone who started on your journey will finish with you.  Not everyone who smiles with you wishes you well.  Not everyone will be able to keep up, because it is not their journey, it is yours.  They will need to find their own path. Because they are no longer on the journey with you does not mean that their journey is not just as important, it means it is their journey. 

Portions of your journey will be lonely even if you are surrounded by people, because you are the one who heard the word.  What you heard clearly may sound like foolishness to others.  Know that the handful of people who remain, who encourage you even if they do not fully understand, are gems. Be thankful for them.

Do not worry about the evil eye from strangers or people you know.  Concentrate on your journey, because life is short.  Stopping to make everyone comfortable with you, with your journey, will not be possible; and in many cases not worth it.  Do not allow yourself to become bogged down in nonsense and noise.  Smile, do your best wherever and whenever you are, stick to your schedule; and don’t forget to eat!