When God's Children Fight

It doesn’t sound good does it? I mean, is that the image we want to portray to the world that Christians fight? Well I have news for you, they already know. The way Christians manage dispute, and the way we deal with the resulting consequences of the dispute, are what the world sees.  Sometimes on television, sometimes in their local churches.   

Many non-Christians believe that Christians should not fight, that we should not make mistakes, that we should not drop the ball.  I have news for you, we are human beings. We will mess up, we will drop the ball, and we will make mistakes.  Part of our transformation is however, that we are willing to correct, to change.  When we become Christians, we are supposed to grow in our knowledge of Christ.  That means we cannot keep the same bad attitudes and dirty habits.  We will not necessarily change overnight, but we should not be anywhere near the same a year or 30 years after we become Christians!  Unfortunately, some Christians do not change.  So you will see the same bad attitude and not much change, year after year after year!

I think this is the struggle most non-Christians have.  They see many Christians acting and talking like non-Christians and they get confused.  Most non-Christians will tell you that although they are not Christians themselves, they know how a Christian should act.  It sounds superficial, but that is the thought process of many non-Christians.  The fact is, most people at least in America, identify with the Christian faith. But identifying with a faith and living the life are two completely different things. 

For those Christians who more than identify, who truly believe, we still run the risk of messing up from time to time. Sorry!  There is a further difference though.  And here’s the clincher, the true Christian’s mess ups should be fewer as the years go by.  After all, like any relationship we are truly interested in cultivating, we want to learn the other person’s personality.  In fact we take on aspects of their personality.  We want to please that person, and we want to stay in relationship with that person.  We learn what makes them tick, what makes them upset, and what makes them happy.  Our relationship with Christ is pretty similar, except that we get more out of the relationship than he does.  In my opinion.  He loves us unconditionally, he wants us to spread the good news about how wonderful a relationship with him would be.  But he also wants us to reflect his attitude toward life, toward others, the more we become like him.

He wants us to be more forgiving. He wants us to be about his business instead of gossiping, backstabbing, and jostling for position.  God wants us to recognize our weaknesses and work on them daily, realizing we will never be perfect. He wants us to be more like him every day, every year, whether it is a year or 30 years from now! 

When we have disagreements especially with other Christians, God wants us to resolve those issues with him in mind.  He wants us to act like brothers and sisters, not mortal enemies.  He does not want us to go for the jugular, pounding each other into the ground, trying to destroy each other.  Those are all worldly and definitely ungodly actions.   We should not forget who or whose we are when we disagree with each other.  If we cannot resolve differences amongst each other like proper Christians, we are showing a bad example to the world.  And we are proving that we have not grown and probably have no intention of doing so.  We are just identifying with Christianity, but not living the life.

God will have the last word in every aspect of our relationship with him, and with each other.  He will give us increase and he will admonish us, because he loves us.  The question is, will you just identify with Christianity, or will you be about the life? 

Top 10 ways to know God can trust you financially

10) No matter your income, broke is a state of mind.  Whether you make $5.00 per hour or $5000.00 per hour, handle your money, do not allow your money to handle you.

9)   Give. Be generous with your time and your finances.  Whether you teach a Sunday school class, give to your local little league, or contribute to your local soup kitchen, be generous. “Cast thy bread upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after many days.” Ecclesiastes 11:1.

8)   Save.  No matter how much or how little you make, save something. There is no excuse for not saving.  The reason most people cannot save is because they are too busy trying to keep up with the Jones's.  There are so many discount stores around these days, anyone can look like a million bucks for less!

7)  Bless someone.  If you feel lead to give something to someone, or even pay for their meal, do it.  It does not matter how much you think they are worth.  Indeed, it does not matter if they are a multi-millionaire and you are not. See the scripture above in number nine. Of course, make sure your ‘blessing’ is done from the right place in your heart.  If you are doing it out of guilt or pride it will not work out.

6) Don’t hate.  Just as I mentioned above in number seven, it does not matter how much a person has or how much you think they have, offer.  It can be done without insulting them, it is a matter of being nice. Allow them the choice to accept or not.

5) Learn from your financial mistakes.  Everyone has made financial mistakes.  The key is to learn from those mistakes, and not repeat them. It may be tempting to repeat something expecting a different outcome, but trust me, the outcome will be the same.

4) Ask for help.  Most employers offer retirement savings plans as part of an employee’s compensation package.  With the retirement savings plan, typically a 401k or 403b; the company your employer hires to manage your 401k offers free assistance.  They can help you choose what mutual fund(s) to invest your 401k or 403b contributions.  The tools are there, do your research and be ready for retirement.   The government is not going to help you get ready for retirement.

3) Pay attention to the world around you.  No matter how you feel about it, we live in a global village.  Everyone is affected by everyone else.  Know what is going on in the world around you.  You do not have to be a professional financial person, news hound, or fluent in multiple languages.  Just be aware.

2) Know your financial weaknesses.  And act accordingly. Make a grocery list so that you do not spend double what you wanted to. Go clothes shopping at your planned time.  Some people buy clothes twice a year.  Or maybe you are shopping for a special occasion.  If not, stay out of the stores if you do not have the will power to ‘just browse’.

1) Know how to wait or to live without.  Stop using your credit card for your wants, and recognize the difference between wants and needs.  If you do not take control of your finances, you are only sabotaging yourself and your future.  “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Philippians 4:12.  When God sees you doing your best with your finances, he will trust you with more.  Leave the Jones's alone!  

What if?

Life is about choices.  We choose to take risks or we choose to live under the radar.  There is no middle ground, no straddling the fence.  We either risk applying for that promotion, or we sit in the same seat year after year.  We either risk asking that person on a date, or we wonder ‘what if?’ We either write that book or we dream about writing that book.  We dream about taking that vacation, or opening that business we think about every day; or we just exist until we die.

They say the cemeteries are filled with unrealized dreams.  We will one day become one of those unrealized dreams or we can take the risk.  What drives risk takers, what pushes us to take the risk? It’s that voice in our head and our gut that says ‘I don’t want to turn 90 and find myself sitting in my rocking chair wondering ‘what if?’  Don’t get me wrong, an integral part of taking risks is failing.  I believe that is what keeps many people from taking risks.  What if you ask her out and she says no?  What if you apply for that job or promotion and someone less qualified gets it?  What if you did not conduct the proper research before opening your business or maybe you did, and it fails within two years of opening?  What if you just break even on that book you decided to publish?  Hey, what if you take that dream vacation and you come back with a stomach virus or worse? 

But what if you succeed? What if you succeed beyond your wildest dreams?  What if you have the vacation of a lifetime with memories you will cherish forever?  What if the success of your book is that it touched one soul, or 10, or 10,000?  What if it takes your business three times before it is successful.  And in the meantime you have to work for someone else during the day and work on your business at night, until it is successful?  What if the person you asked out said no and then you met the person of your dreams?  Risk, what if?

Many years ago, I worked for a brokerage firm for more than a decade.  The last seven of those 11 years I was a Registered Representative—aka a stock broker.  It took me several years to get to that level, and I have to say I loved my job.  I loved, and still love, the energy of the stock market.  But some days I hated my job!  I would find myself staring out the window, wondering ‘what if?’  Then the layoffs happened. 250 of us in one day!  My life changed immensely after that day.  I vowed never to go back into the world of finance and thought I would try the healthcare industry. 

My first job in the healthcare industry, an entry level position, I lasted two and half years.  Then I was fired!  I was taking too much time with the patients.  I had never been fired before! The next employment opportunity, same job different company, I took that entry level position again; hoping to get in and move up in the company.  I seriously wanted to; thought I would, stay there until retirement! I tried for six years to move up, but to no avail.  I sat in an entry level position making thousands less than I had made as a broker, but thankful for a job.  We all know the stories of how many people are under-employed.  After six years however, I could not take it anymore.  I resigned.  It was now or never. 

The months preceding my resignation, that was all I heard, ‘it’s now or never!’  I heard it in church sermons and conversations with strangers who did not know my situation.  Everywhere I turned, I heard the warning, ‘it’s now or never’.  I kept thinking ‘I have to do this.  I may never get another chance’.  But I would push the thought out of my mind because it just was not practical.  It was not the right time!             

Well, here I am.  I’m working at my ‘what if’.  Is it scary? Yes it is!  Do I sometimes hear the voice in my head asking me if I’m crazy? Yes.  Do I ask myself what about being prepared for retirement?  Definitely! Suppose! Suppose, suppose, suppose!? What response do I give myself? ‘I know, suppose, but what if?’

I intend to...

Intention. It seems like an innocuous word filled with hope doesn't it? Honestly, it's a word that gets on my nerves because it is usually preceded by some task that was supposed to be completed but was not.  Usually the task or event was not done because something else got in the way.  'I intended to wash the dishes, but I got caught up in a long telephone call with Aunt Nelly'.  I intended to go to church this morning, but I decided to sleep in after a late night of studying'.  'I intended to finish my homework by the deadline, but I got sidetracked'.  Excuses, all excuses.  Even if the excuse is a good one, it is still an excuse.  And though I believe intentions not followed through are excuses, we will all be found guilty of these in-completes at one time or another through out our lives. The best we can do is to make sure our in-completes become less as we mature.

We can do this by making sure we do not have too much on our plates at any given time.  We have to make our no mean no, and our yes mean yes.  It takes work, we might lose friends and acquaintances, but we must remember that we only live once and life is short.  We cannot afford to get mired in overly long to-do lists and being talked into taking on tasks we have no business saying yes to.

But what if we turned intention on it's head? What if we decided to live life with intention instead of intending to do things we never get to?  What if we chose intention instead of bitterness? I believe, as do most people, that life is about choices.  We choose to get out of bed in the morning whether we want to or not.  We choose to go to school or work whether we want to or not.  We choose joy instead of bitterness.  We choose happiness instead of sadness.  Don't get me wrong, I am not saying to pretend we don't feel a certain way.  We are beings with emotions: happiness, sadness, anger, etc.  But what we do with those emotions is what is important.  As we mature physically, emotionally, and spiritually, we must live with intention.

Life takes us through some very sad places.  For many of us life did not turn out the way we expected. Some of have been hit with untimely death, unwanted divorce, a marriage that never happened, or children we never had.  For many of us, our hearts have been broken and twisted into unrecognizable forms.  Hearts broken into so many pieces we do not believe they will ever be put back together again.  But what would happen if we lived with the intention that whether our hearts healed or not, we would be a positive force in our little corner of the world? What if we lived with the intention that our broken hearts would not rule us, but that we would rule that brokenness? What if we realized that the brokenness became less, even if it never completely disappeared?  What if we found that in the brokenness we realized our calling, the reason we were put on this earth?

No, the broken heart and broken dreams are definitely not the path we would have chosen, but the fact is it happened.  What we do about it is what matters.  What if we lived with intention?